Sometimes Discipline Is Knowing When NOT To Push Yourself
Which is also a great way to build self trust
As eclipse season ends and spring promises its on the way, I’m gently laying myself down.
At the time of writing, I’m curled under a weighted blanket, bonnet askew, hot chocolate beside me, watching the snow fall in the same spots it melted from just days ago.
In the past few months, I’ve received a lot of exciting ideas and clear directives on how to move forward with them. One would think that because I have enough answers and the divine go ahead to execute that I’d be allll over it by now. But there has been this internal urge to be slow and to be silent right now – just listen, just be.
It’s not quite comfortable and part of me was nervous that I might lose momentum by pausing in this way for an undetermined amount of time. However, I’ve experienced enough cycles of this process (a torrent of creative visions followed by lethargy) that I now trust my energy to come back to me.
I’ll note, it’s always a bit scary to feel that wall and the sudden drop in capacity. But through exercising the restraint to not force myself to show up in ways that aren’t accessible in the moment, I show my body that it can trust me. I show the me who needs to rest that I will not punish us for being human.
Instead, I’ve taken some lovely baths, watched Spy x Family, and read a lot of fantasy novels.
And today I feel the end of this cycle drawing near. Because it always ends (eventually).
You’re not going to force the creative process to be linear by resenting what is currently true. And you can’t be a good life partner to yourself and your creativity if you refuse to honor your cycles.
A simple – but not always easy 😒– way to build or repair self trust is to allow the season you’re in to run its course without making yourself wrong for being in it.
Much love,
Athena
Questions of the Week
What are your creature comforts when you’re low capacity?
When is the last time you were in an “undesirable” season in your life? Was there any specific event or action that brought it to an end or did it just go away on its own?
In what ways might you be punishing yourself for just being human?
Imagine relaxing into an uncomfortable season of life because you know that it’s temporary. What does that feel like in the body? How would your perception of time shift?
Offer Announcement!
Starting March 18th, I’ll facilitate a 30 day devotional practice to help folks build their ability to embrace uncertainty. Facing uncertainty is a muscle and a skill that can be developed, and we can practice together. More info to come, but you can take a first look HERE.
*If you’re interested, here’s my current fav bath recipe:
Near boiling water (because I need a hug)
Mood lighting (i like a deeeeep purple or a non alarming red)
Alice Coltrane (preferably one song on loop so it’s gets a little ~weird~)
Essential oils: Jasmine, Cardamom, and 1 drop of Grapefruit for a lil pop
Post bath outfit MUST be entirely fleece OR entirely silk (or whatever your favorite textures are)